Possible: How We Survive in an Age of Conflict by William Ury Summary

1. Adopt a possibilist mindset to reframe conflicts as catalysts for growth.
2. Transform conflict into creative solutions using Ury's "Circle of Possibility" model.
3. Start negotiations by "going to the balcony" to regain emotional clarity.
4. Build "golden bridges" to turn adversaries into collaborators during tense disputes.
5. Engage the "third side" to leverage community support for sustainable resolutions.
6. Replace reactive anger with curiosity to uncover hidden opportunities in disagreements.
7. Apply possibilism principles to personal feuds, corporate battles, and geopolitical crises.
8. Develop conflict literacy by viewing differences as pathways to innovation.
9. Channel William Ury's possibilist strategies to prevent escalation in high-stakes negotiations.
10. Treat conflicts as natural human systems requiring creative stewardship, not suppression.

About the Author

William Ury, co-author of the international bestseller Getting to Yes and author of Possible: How We Survive (and Thrive) in an Age of Conflict, is a globally recognized negotiation expert and conflict resolution pioneer. A co-founder of Harvard’s Program on Negotiation, Ury combines anthropological insights with decades of experience mediating high-stakes disputes, from Cold War nuclear crises to Colombia’s 50-year civil war. His work explores transforming adversarial conflicts into collaborative solutions across business, government, and communities.

Ury’s influential frameworks appear in other acclaimed books like Getting Past No and The Power of a Positive No, which address navigating difficult negotiations. A sought-after speaker, he has delivered TED Talks and appeared on podcasts like The Tim Ferriss Show, sharing strategies tested with Fortune 500 executives, world leaders, and grassroots peacebuilders.

Getting to Yes has sold over 15 million copies worldwide and remains essential reading in business and law schools, cementing Ury’s legacy as a visionary in conflict resolution.

FAQs About This Book

What is Possible by William Ury about?

Possible by William Ury explores transforming conflict into opportunities for growth through a three-step framework: "Go to the Balcony" (gain perspective), "Build a Golden Bridge" (collaborate on solutions), and "Engage the Third Side" (leverage community support). Drawing on Ury’s 45+ years mediating high-stakes conflicts—from Cold War crises to corporate disputes—the book argues that conflict, when managed constructively, drives innovation and progress.

Who should read Possible?

Leaders, negotiators, policymakers, and anyone navigating personal or professional conflicts will benefit. Ury’s actionable methods apply to workplace disputes, family tensions, and global diplomacy, making it ideal for CEOs, mediators, activists, and individuals seeking strategies to turn adversarial situations into collaborative solutions.

Is Possible worth reading?

Yes, particularly for its tested, real-world frameworks. Ury’s approach, validated in Harvard’s Program on Negotiation and conflict zones like Colombia and Ukraine, offers practical tools to reframe disagreements. The blend of memoir, case studies, and tactical advice makes it a standout guide for modern conflict resolution.

What are the three steps in William Ury’s conflict resolution framework?

1. Go to the Balcony: Observe emotions and dynamics objectively.
2. Build a Golden Bridge: Co-create solutions addressing all parties’ needs.
3. Engage the Third Side: Mobilize community support to sustain agreements.

This process helps de-escalate tensions and fosters lasting outcomes.

How does Possible suggest handling workplace conflicts?

Ury advises stepping back (“balcony”) to avoid reactive decisions, then collaboratively designing mutually beneficial solutions (“golden bridge”). Involving neutral stakeholders (“third side”)—like HR or mentors—can prevent escalation. These tactics are drawn from Ury’s corporate mediation experience, including resolving boardroom standoffs.

What is the “Third Side” concept in Possible?

The “Third Side” refers to engaging impartial third parties—communities, leaders, or institutions—to reinforce resolutions. By creating accountability and support networks, this approach prevents relapse into conflict, as seen in Ury’s work ending Colombia’s 50-year civil war.

How does Possible apply to international diplomacy?

Ury’s methods have shaped peace processes in Ukraine, Colombia, and Cold War nuclear negotiations. For example, his “third side” strategy mobilized global allies to support Colombia’s peace deal, demonstrating how external stakeholders can stabilize fragile agreements.

How does Possible compare to Ury’s Getting to Yes?

While Getting to Yes focuses on negotiation tactics for mutual gain, Possible addresses broader conflict transformation. It emphasizes mindset shifts (balcony), systemic collaboration (bridge), and community-powered sustainability (third side), reflecting Ury’s evolution from deal-making to holistic resolution.

Can Possible help with family conflicts?

Yes. Ury shares examples of resolving family feuds by applying the same principles used in global disputes: pausing to gain perspective, identifying shared goals, and involving trusted mediators. These steps reduce emotional reactivity and foster reconciliation.

What case studies are included in Possible?

Key examples include mediating the US-USSR nuclear crisis, Colombia’s civil war, Ukraine’s conflict, and corporate labor strikes. Ury also details personal stories, like defusing a tense encounter with Venezuela’s Hugo Chávez.

How does Possible address modern societal divisions?

Ury argues polarization stems from unmanaged conflict, not conflict itself. His framework offers tools to reframe debates—like political divides—as collaborative problem-solving opportunities, urging societies to embrace conflict as a catalyst for innovation.

What are the key takeaways from Possible?

1. Conflict is inevitable but manageable.
2. Perspective-taking (“balcony”) prevents escalation.
3. Sustainable solutions require inclusive collaboration.
4. Community support ensures lasting peace.

These principles empower individuals and nations to thrive amid discord.