You Mean I’m Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?! by Kate Kelly and Peggy Ramundo Summary

You Mean I’m Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?! is a self-help guide for adults with ADHD, offering practical strategies, personal anecdotes, and moral support. It explains ADHD symptoms, debunks misconceptions, and provides actionable advice for managing daily challenges like organization, relationships, and self-esteem. The book emphasizes non-medication approaches, including mindfulness and coaching, while addressing topics like gender differences and ADHD’s impact on sexuality.

This book is ideal for adults diagnosed with ADHD (especially those newly diagnosed), individuals exploring potential ADHD symptoms, or family members seeking to understand loved ones. It’s also valuable for therapists, coaches, or educators working with ADHD populations. The authors’ empathetic tone and relatable examples resonate with readers seeking validation and practical coping mechanisms.

Yes, for its empathetic approach and actionable strategies. Many readers praise its life-changing insights, humor, and relatable stories, calling it a “savior” for understanding ADHD. However, some criticize its occasional focus on “recovery” and outdated sections. The revised 2005 edition updates medication advice and expands on topics like gender differences, making it more relevant.

It provides tools for organization, memory improvement, and task prioritization, tailored to ADHD brains. Strategies include breaking tasks into steps, creating routines, and using visual reminders. The authors also emphasize self-compassion, reframing ADHD traits as strengths, and building supportive systems at work and home.

Key approaches include mindfulness meditation, ADHD coaching, cognitive-behavioral techniques, and environmental adjustments. The authors advocate for lifestyle changes like exercise, dietary tweaks, and sleep hygiene, while stressing the importance of community support and therapy.

It explores how hormonal fluctuations (e.g., estrogen levels) impact ADHD symptoms in women, discussing challenges like societal expectations, emotional dysregulation, and late diagnoses. The authors provide gender-specific strategies for managing relationships, career pressures, and self-image.

Some readers find parts overly optimistic about “overcoming” ADHD, noting the condition isn’t curable. Critics also mention repetitive sections and outdated terminology (e.g., “ADD” vs. “ADHD”). However, many appreciate its foundational insights despite these limitations.

• Core message: “ADHD isn’t a defect—it’s a difference requiring tailored strategies.”
• Self-compassion: “Stop blaming yourself for brain chemistry.”
• Productivity hack: “Progress, not perfection, is the goal.”

These ideas reinforce reframing ADHD as a neurotype needing adaptation, not correction.

The 2005 update adds sections on newer ADHD medications, the role of estrogen in women’s symptoms, and modern coaching techniques. It expands discussions on mindfulness and includes contemporary research while retaining the original’s humor and structure.

While newer books may include updated neuroscience, this remains a classic for its holistic, experience-driven approach. It excels in validating emotional struggles and offering pragmatic lifestyle adjustments, whereas modern titles often focus more on clinical research or productivity hacks.

Yes. It offers communication strategies for reducing conflict, managing forgetfulness, and balancing responsibilities. Sections on intimacy and ADHD’s impact on sexuality provide frank advice for maintaining healthy partnerships.

Despite being 30+ years old, its focus on self-acceptance and systemic coping mechanisms remains vital. As ADHD awareness grows, the book’s humane tone and non-pathologizing framework continue to resonate, though readers should supplement it with current research.