BeFreed
    Categories>Communication skill>What We Say Matters
    What We Say Matters book cover

    What We Say Matters by Judith Hanson Lasater & Ike K. Lasater Summary

    What We Say Matters
    Judith Hanson Lasater & Ike K. Lasater
    4.08 (520 Reviews)
    Communication skillRelationshipMindfulnessPhilosophy
    Overview
    Key Takeaways
    Author
    FAQs

    Overview of What We Say Matters

    Discover the transformative power of words in "What We Say Matters," where nonviolent communication meets Buddhist wisdom. With over 64,000 Goodreads ratings, this practical guide has revolutionized relationships, workplaces, and parenting - all by changing how we express our deepest needs.

    Similar books to What We Say Matters

    Explore Your Way of Learning
    Quick Summary11min

    Feel the book through the author's voice

    Deep Dive42min

    Turn knowledge into engaging, example-rich insights

    Flash Card7 insights

    Capture key ideas in a flash for fast learning

    Fun23min

    Enjoy the book in a fun and engaging way

    Best quote from What We Say Matters

    “

    What makes speech truly "spiritual" isn't using special terminology but making an internal shift in awareness.

    ”
    Explore Your Way of Learning
    What We Say Matters isn't just a book — it's a masterclass in Communication skill. To help you absorb its lessons in the way that works best for you, we offer five unique learning modes. Whether you're a deep thinker, a fast learner, or a story lover, there's a mode designed to fit your style.

    Quick Summary Mode - Read or listen to What We Say Matters Summary in 11 Minutes

    Quick Summary
    Quick Summary
    What We Say Matters Summary in 11 Minutes

    Break down key ideas from What We Say Matters into bite-sized takeaways to understand how innovative teams create, collaborate, and grow.

    play
    00:00
    00:00
    Your browser does not support the audio element.

    Flash Card Mode - Top 7 Insights from What We Say Matters in a Nutshell

    Flash Card
    Flash Card
    Top 7 Insights from What We Say Matters in a Nutshell

    Distill What We Say Matters into rapid-fire memory cues that highlight key principles of candor, teamwork, and creative resilience.

    Flash Mode Swiper

    Fun Mode - What We Say Matters Lessons Told Through 23-Min Stories

    Fun
    Fun
    What We Say Matters Lessons Told Through 23-Min Stories

    Experience What We Say Matters through vivid storytelling that turns innovation lessons into moments you'll remember and apply.

    play
    00:00
    00:00
    Your browser does not support the audio element.

    Personalize Mode - Read or listen to What We Say Matters Summary in 0 Minutes

    Personalize
    Personalize
    Experience What We Say Matters in your own way.

    Ask anything, pick the voice, and co-create insights that truly resonate with you.

    Personalize Mode

    From Columbia University alumni built in San Francisco

    BeFreed Brings Together A Global Community Of 1,000,000 Curious Minds
    See more on how BeFreed is discussed across the web

    "Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."

    @Moemenn
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."

    @Chloe, Solo founder, LA
    platform
    comments
    12
    likes
    117

    "Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."

    @Raaaaaachelw
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."

    @Matt, YC alum
    platform
    comments
    12
    likes
    108

    "Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."

    @Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
    platform
    comments
    254
    likes
    17

    "Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."

    @djmikemoore
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."

    @Pitiful
    platform
    comments
    96
    likes
    4.5K

    "BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."

    @SofiaP
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"

    @Jaded_Falcon
    platform
    comments
    201
    thumbsUp
    16

    "It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."

    @OojasSalunke
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."

    @Leo, Law Student, UPenn
    platform
    comments
    37
    likes
    483

    "Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"

    @Cashflowbubu
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    From Columbia University alumni built in San Francisco

    BeFreed Brings Together A Global Community Of 1,000,000 Curious Minds
    See more on how BeFreed is discussed across the web

    "Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."

    @Moemenn
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."

    @Chloe, Solo founder, LA
    platform
    comments
    12
    likes
    117

    "Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."

    @Raaaaaachelw
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."

    @Matt, YC alum
    platform
    comments
    12
    likes
    108

    "Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."

    @Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
    platform
    comments
    254
    likes
    17

    "Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."

    @djmikemoore
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."

    @Pitiful
    platform
    comments
    96
    likes
    4.5K

    "BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."

    @SofiaP
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"

    @Jaded_Falcon
    platform
    comments
    201
    thumbsUp
    16

    "It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."

    @OojasSalunke
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."

    @Leo, Law Student, UPenn
    platform
    comments
    37
    likes
    483

    "Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"

    @Cashflowbubu
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."

    @Moemenn
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."

    @Chloe, Solo founder, LA
    platform
    comments
    12
    likes
    117

    "Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."

    @Raaaaaachelw
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."

    @Matt, YC alum
    platform
    comments
    12
    likes
    108

    "Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."

    @Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
    platform
    comments
    254
    likes
    17

    "Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."

    @djmikemoore
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."

    @Pitiful
    platform
    comments
    96
    likes
    4.5K

    "BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."

    @SofiaP
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"

    @Jaded_Falcon
    platform
    comments
    201
    thumbsUp
    16

    "It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."

    @OojasSalunke
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."

    @Leo, Law Student, UPenn
    platform
    comments
    37
    likes
    483

    "Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"

    @Cashflowbubu
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."

    @Moemenn
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."

    @Chloe, Solo founder, LA
    platform
    comments
    12
    likes
    117

    "Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."

    @Raaaaaachelw
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."

    @Matt, YC alum
    platform
    comments
    12
    likes
    108

    "Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."

    @Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
    platform
    comments
    254
    likes
    17

    "Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."

    @djmikemoore
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."

    @Pitiful
    platform
    comments
    96
    likes
    4.5K

    "BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."

    @SofiaP
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"

    @Jaded_Falcon
    platform
    comments
    201
    thumbsUp
    16

    "It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."

    @OojasSalunke
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star

    "The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."

    @Leo, Law Student, UPenn
    platform
    comments
    37
    likes
    483

    "Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"

    @Cashflowbubu
    platform
    star
    star
    star
    star
    star
    1.5K Ratings4.7
    Start your learning journey, now
    BeFreed App
    Download This Summary

    Get the What We Say Matters summary as a free PDF or EPUB. Print it or read offline anytime.

    BeFreed

    Learn Anything, Personalized

    DiscordLinkedIn
    Featured book summaries
    Crucial ConversationsThe Perfect MarriageInto the WildNever Split the DifferenceAttachedGood to GreatSay Nothing
    Trending categories
    Self HelpCommunication SkillRelationshipMindfulnessPhilosophyInspirationProductivity
    Celebrities' reading list
    Elon MuskCharlie KirkBill GatesSteve JobsAndrew HubermanJoe RoganJordan Peterson
    Award winning collection
    Pulitzer PrizeNational Book AwardGoodreads Choice AwardsNobel Prize in LiteratureNew York TimesCaldecott MedalNebula Award
    Featured Topics
    ManagementAmerican HistoryWarTradingStoicismAnxietySex
    Best books by Year
    2025 Best Non Fiction Books2024 Best Non Fiction Books2023 Best Non Fiction Books
    Featured authors
    Chimamanda Ngozi AdichieGeorge OrwellO. J. SimpsonBarbara O'NeillWinston ChurchillCharlie Kirk
    BeFreed vs other apps
    BeFreed vs. Other Book Summary AppsBeFreed vs. ElevenReaderBeFreed vs. ReadwiseBeFreed vs. Anki
    Learning tools
    Knowledge VisualizerAI Podcast Generator
    Information
    About Usarrow
    Pricingarrow
    FAQarrow
    Blogarrow
    Careerarrow
    Partnershipsarrow
    Ambassador Programarrow
    Directoryarrow
    BeFreed
    Try now
    © 2026 BeFreed
    Term of UsePrivacy Policy
    BeFreed

    Learn Anything, Personalized

    DiscordLinkedIn
    Featured book summaries
    Crucial ConversationsThe Perfect MarriageInto the WildNever Split the DifferenceAttachedGood to GreatSay Nothing
    Trending categories
    Self HelpCommunication SkillRelationshipMindfulnessPhilosophyInspirationProductivity
    Celebrities' reading list
    Elon MuskCharlie KirkBill GatesSteve JobsAndrew HubermanJoe RoganJordan Peterson
    Award winning collection
    Pulitzer PrizeNational Book AwardGoodreads Choice AwardsNobel Prize in LiteratureNew York TimesCaldecott MedalNebula Award
    Featured Topics
    ManagementAmerican HistoryWarTradingStoicismAnxietySex
    Best books by Year
    2025 Best Non Fiction Books2024 Best Non Fiction Books2023 Best Non Fiction Books
    Learning tools
    Knowledge VisualizerAI Podcast Generator
    Featured authors
    Chimamanda Ngozi AdichieGeorge OrwellO. J. SimpsonBarbara O'NeillWinston ChurchillCharlie Kirk
    BeFreed vs other apps
    BeFreed vs. Other Book Summary AppsBeFreed vs. ElevenReaderBeFreed vs. ReadwiseBeFreed vs. Anki
    Information
    About Usarrow
    Pricingarrow
    FAQarrow
    Blogarrow
    Careerarrow
    Partnershipsarrow
    Ambassador Programarrow
    Directoryarrow
    BeFreed
    Try now
    © 2026 BeFreed
    Term of UsePrivacy Policy

    More Like This

    book cover
    Say What You Mean
    Oren Jay Sofer
    A mindful guide to effective communication, blending Buddhist wisdom with nonviolent techniques for more meaningful conversations and relationships.
    book cover
    We Need to Talk
    Celeste Headlee
    A guide to having meaningful conversations in a disconnected world, offering practical strategies to improve communication skills.
    book cover
    Words Can Change Your Brain
    Andrew Newberg & Mark Robert Waldman
    Discover powerful communication techniques backed by neuroscience to enhance relationships, resolve conflicts, and build trust through mindful conversation.
    book cover
    Say What They Can't Unhear
    Tamsen Webster
    Unlock the power of persuasion with nine principles that create lasting change by tapping into core human psychology.
    podcast cover
    source 1source 2source 3source 4
    6 sources
    Nonviolent Communication: Building Bridges Through Authentic Connection
    Discover how to transform conflict into connection through presence, curiosity, and speaking from what truly matters. Learn practical tools for deep listening, expressing needs without blame, and creating genuine understanding in all your relationships.
    book cover
    Can We Talk?
    Roberta Chinsky Matuson
    Master difficult workplace conversations with confidence using seven key principles for effective communication and relationship-building.
    podcast cover
    AssertivenessQuick ConfidenceMastering Communication at WorkSpeak Like a CEO
    26 sources
    Mastering the Silent Language of Connection
    Discover how to align your nonverbal cues with your words to build trust, resolve conflict, and master the art of high-impact communication.
    podcast cover
    How to Talk to AnyoneThe Fine Art Of Small TalkGot Your Attention?The Art of Witty Banter
    25 sources
    The Science of Meaningful Connection
    Discover how mastering conversation through science-backed techniques can transform your social interactions and boost wellbeing. Learn why our intuitions about good conversation are often wrong and how small changes create powerful connections.

    Key Takeaways

    1

    When Words Become Weapons or Bridges

    play
    00:00
    00:00
    Your browser does not support the audio element.

    Have you ever left a conversation feeling completely drained, as if someone just vacuumed the energy right out of you? Or experienced the opposite-a talk that left you buzzing with connection and understanding? The difference isn't random. It lies in something most of us never learned: how to speak with awareness. We master calculus and chemistry, memorize historical dates and literary devices, yet somehow graduate into adulthood without the slightest clue about conscious communication. We wield language like toddlers swinging hammers, unaware of our power to build or destroy. What if the secret to transforming every relationship in your life-with partners, children, colleagues, even strangers-isn't about what you say, but how you say it? This isn't about political correctness or walking on eggshells. It's about recognizing that each word we speak creates ripples that either connect us or push us further apart. Ancient traditions understood something we've lost: words shape reality. In yoga philosophy, satya (truthfulness) ranks as the second most important ethical principle, right after non-harming. But here's the twist-satya isn't just about honesty. It's about restraint, asking us to pause before speaking and consider whether our words might cause unnecessary pain. Buddhism's concept of "right speech" goes further, outlining four specific things to avoid: lies, gossip, harsh words, and meaningless chatter. Think about your last few conversations. How many would pass this test? These traditions recognized speech's dual power: it reveals our internal landscape while simultaneously shaping others' experiences. When you snap "You never listen!" you're not just describing reality-you're creating it, triggering defensiveness that ensures you won't be heard. But say instead "I feel unheard when I'm speaking and you're looking at your phone," and suddenly there's space for understanding rather than combat.

    2

    The Foundation of Nonviolent Communication

    3

    Four Choices and Clear Requests That Transform Interactions

    4

    Rewriting Your Internal Script and Transforming Interpretation

    5

    When Truth Meets Kindness and Anger Meets Awareness

    6

    The Practice Ground of Intimate Partnership

    7

    Living Compassion in Every Conversation