Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication book cover

Say What You Mean Summary

A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication

Oren Jay Sofer
4.15(3260 Reviews)

Say What You Mean Summary Overview

In a world of miscommunication, Sofer's mindfulness-based approach transforms how we speak and listen. Endorsed by Tara Brach and Jack Kornfield, this practical guide integrates Buddhist wisdom with nonviolent communication techniques. What conversation could change your life if you finally said what you meant?

Key Themes in the Say What You Mean Summary

  • nonviolent communication
  • mindful listening
  • relational awareness
  • somatic self-regulation
  • empathetic dialogue

Best Quotes from the Say What You Mean Summary

  • Communication sits at the center of human existence.

  • Without presence, true understanding cannot occur.

  • Pausing functions as a mini-meditation.

  • Not knowing is most intimate.

Characters in the Say What You Mean Summary

  • Oren Jay SoferAuthor and teacher of mindful communication
  • Marshall RosenbergDeveloper of Nonviolent Communication
  • Sharon SalzbergMeditation teacher and author who praised the book
  • Rick HansonPsychologist who recommends the book's methods

About the Author

About the Author of Say What You Mean

Oren Jay Sofer, bestselling author of Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication, is a renowned meditation teacher and communication expert, blending Buddhist wisdom with modern psychology. A Columbia University graduate in Comparative Religion, he trained for over two decades in early Buddhist meditation under teachers like Joseph Goldstein and spent years as a monastic in Thailand’s Ajahn Chah Forest Tradition. His work integrates trauma-informed Somatics and Marshall Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication, reflecting his certifications as a SEP practitioner and NVC trainer.

The book’s practical framework for mindful dialogue draws from Sofer’s roles as a Spirit Rock Meditation Center faculty member and co-founder of Mindful Healthcare. His follow-up, Your Heart Was Made for This, expands on contemplative practices for societal challenges, while his co-authored Teaching Mindfulness to Empower Adolescents remains a key resource in educational settings.

Sofer’s guided meditations and courses on platforms like Ten Percent Happier and Calm have reached millions globally. A founding teacher at Mindful Schools, his methods are utilized by therapists, educators, and Fortune 500 leaders. Say What You Mean has become a staple in communication workshops and mindfulness curricula since its 2018 release.

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