The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women book cover

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women by Valerie Young Summary

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women
Valerie Young
Psychology
Self Help
Career
Overview
Key Takeaways
Author
FAQs

Overview of The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women

Unmasking the impostor syndrome that haunts high-achieving women. Endorsed by the very researchers who discovered this phenomenon, Young's work is so transformative that Barbara Winter compared it to "The Feminine Mystique." What hidden thoughts are sabotaging your success right now?

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Key Takeaways from The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women

  1. Impostor syndrome affects accomplished women across all career levels universally.
  2. Valerie Young identifies perfectionism and overpreparation as fraud fear coping mechanisms.
  3. Women internalize failure while men externalize it to external circumstances.
  4. Reframe mistakes as learning opportunities instead of personal character flaws.
  5. Success feels like luck when you discount your actual skills.
  6. Playing big means refusing to make yourself a little person.
  7. Fake it till you make it builds confidence through action.
  8. Women fear success will damage relationships and isolate them socially.
  9. The Secret Thoughts framework helps women own their success confidently.
  10. Depersonalize criticism by separating feedback from your inherent self-worth.
  11. Your deepest fear is being powerful beyond measure not inadequate.
  12. Risk-taking is a developable skill that expands your comfort zone.

Overview of its author - Valerie Young

Dr. Valerie Young is an internationally-recognized expert on impostor syndrome and author of the award-winning book "The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women: Why Capable People Suffer from the Impostor Syndrome and How to Thrive in Spite of It." As co-founder of the Impostor Syndrome Institute, she has spent over four decades researching this psychological phenomenon affecting high-achieving individuals who doubt their accomplishments.

Young earned her doctoral degree from the University of Massachusetts, Amherst, where she studied internal barriers to women's achievement. A former Fortune 200 manager, she delivers her transformative program at over 100 universities—including Harvard, Stanford, MIT, and Oxford—and advises major organizations such as Google, NASA, Microsoft, and Boeing.

Her work has been featured in Time, Newsweek, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, and BBC radio. The book has been translated into six languages and is widely recommended by mental health professionals and business leaders worldwide.

Common FAQs of The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women

What is The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women about?

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women by Dr. Valerie Young explores impostor syndrome—the phenomenon where accomplished professionals feel like frauds despite their success. The book examines why capable women doubt their abilities, attribute achievements to luck rather than skill, and fear being "unmasked" as incompetent. Young combines decades of research with practical strategies to help readers overcome self-limiting beliefs and take ownership of their accomplishments.

Who is Valerie Young and why is she qualified to write about impostor syndrome?

Dr. Valerie Young is an internationally recognized expert on impostor syndrome with over 30 years of experience researching and addressing this phenomenon. She earned her doctoral degree in education from the University of Massachusetts, where she studied internal barriers to women's occupational achievement. Young has spoken at over 100 universities including MIT, Harvard, and Stanford, and delivered programs at major organizations like Google, NASA, Boeing, and Facebook. Her work has been featured in publications including Time, The Wall Street Journal, and Psychology Today.

Who should read The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women?

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women is essential reading for professional women who feel like impostors in their careers, though men experiencing similar doubts will also benefit. The book particularly resonates with high-achievers who attribute success to luck, agonize over mistakes, or fear being exposed as frauds. Whether you're a Ph.D. candidate, senior executive, entrepreneur, or anyone struggling with persistent self-doubt despite accomplishments, Young's insights and action-oriented solutions address the psychological patterns undermining your confidence.

Is The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women worth reading?

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women is an award-winning book that Publishers Weekly gave a starred review, praising Young's "extremely perceptive and action-oriented solutions". Unlike other books on the topic, Young provides measurable, practical strategies rather than just acknowledging the problem. The book has been translated into six languages and used by hundreds of organizations worldwide. Readers consistently report that Young's step-by-step plan helps them finally feel as capable as others know they are, making it a valuable investment for anyone battling impostor feelings.

What is impostor syndrome according to Valerie Young?

According to Valerie Young in The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women, impostor syndrome is the experience of feeling like a fraud despite clear evidence of success and competence. It manifests as persistent self-doubt where accomplished individuals believe their achievements result from luck, timing, or others' mistakes rather than their own abilities. Those experiencing impostor syndrome constantly fear being "found out" or "unmasked" and mentally dismiss their accomplishments while magnifying perceived shortcomings.

Why does impostor syndrome affect women more than men?

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women explains that women are more likely to agonize over tiny mistakes, interpret constructive criticism as evidence of inadequacy, and attribute success to external factors rather than skill. Young notes that when male students are treated poorly, they think the instructor is a jerk, but female students conclude they don't belong. The book examines how societal factors—including the reality that "striving while female" is often punished—contribute to women's heightened vulnerability to impostor feelings.

What are the main self-sabotaging behaviors discussed in The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women?

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women identifies several self-sabotaging patterns including crippling perfectionism, chronic overpreparation, and maintaining an unnecessarily low profile. Young explains how impostor syndrome causes women to withhold their talents and opinions, avoid finishing important projects, and become more risk-averse than male peers. These behaviors drain energy and confidence while potentially hurting future success by making women less self-promoting and more hesitant to pursue opportunities.

What practical strategies does Valerie Young offer to overcome impostor syndrome?

Valerie Young's The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women provides actionable solutions including focusing on actual, measurable achievements without editorializing—what she calls "just the facts, ma'am". Young encourages women to take cues from male colleagues and "fake it till they make it" rather than waiting to feel completely confident. The book offers a step-by-step plan to banish thought patterns that undermine capability, helping readers reframe their internal monologue and take ownership of their success.

How does The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women explain the "waiting to be unmasked" feeling?

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women describes how impostor syndrome sufferers live in constant fear of exposure, thinking "It's just a matter of time before I am found out" or "Someone must have made a terrible mistake". Young explains this persistent anxiety as a disconnect between external evidence of competence and internal feelings of fraudulence. When these individuals do succeed, they think "Phew, I fooled 'em again" rather than recognizing their genuine abilities, perpetuating a exhausting cycle of self-doubt.

What does Valerie Young say about the role of luck versus skill in success?

In The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women, Valerie Young addresses how women experiencing impostor syndrome chalk up their accomplishments to luck rather than skill. This tendency to externalize success—believing "I was in the right place at the right time" or "It's only because they like me"—prevents women from internalizing their competence. Young's framework helps readers recognize and challenge this distorted thinking pattern, encouraging them to accurately attribute achievements to their abilities and efforts.

How has The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women been received by critics and readers?

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women received a starred review from Publishers Weekly, which praised the book's "extremely perceptive and action-oriented solutions" and called it "a can't-miss primer for business women everywhere". The award-winning book has been published in six languages and adopted by major organizations worldwide for professional development. Readers report that Young's insights finally provide the solution they've been seeking, with many sharing success stories about overcoming long-held self-limiting beliefs after reading the book.

What makes The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women different from other books on impostor syndrome?

The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women stands out for its solution-oriented approach backed by decades of original research specifically on women's self-limiting beliefs. While other books may acknowledge impostor syndrome, Young provides concrete, action-oriented strategies grounded in her doctoral research on internal barriers to women's achievement. Publishers Weekly noted that "though there's been much written on this difficult topic, Young's extremely perceptive and action-oriented solutions shine", making it uniquely practical and implementable for readers seeking lasting change.

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