lines-bg

The Chemistry of Betrayal: How Modern Love Dies and Revives

clock12 min

Why do relationships that once felt like oxygen suddenly suffocate? Drawing from Helen Fisher's neuroscience, Esther Perel's therapy insights, and the Gottmans' research, this episode reveals the paradoxical biology of attraction versus attachment and offers practical strategies to protect love in a digital age.

The Chemistry of Betrayal: How Modern Love Dies and Revives
star

How This Personalized Podcast Was Made

This podcast was created using BeFreed’s AI, based on selected books, the creator’s learning goals, and their preferred tone.

The interplay of attachment styles and marital infidelity: A systematic review and meta-analysis
link
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2405844023104695
Why we love, why we cheat
link
https://www.ted.com/speakers/helen_fisher
A meta-analytic study of partner phubbing and its antecedents and consequences
link
https://ouci.dntb.gov.ua/en/works/96GGqBW0/
Partner's perception of phubbing is more relevant than the behavior itself: A daily diary study
link
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0747563222001455
Wired for Love: A Neuroscientist’s Journey Through Romance, Loss, and the Essence of Human Connection
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/13096846-wired-for-love
The All-or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34020579-the-all-or-nothing-marriage
The science of love | TEDxVeniceBeach
link
https://www.ted.com/speakers/john_gottman
The mate switching hypothesis
link
https://colab.ws/articles/10.1016%2Fj.paid.2016.07.022
Our adventures make me feel secure: Novel activities boost relationship satisfaction through felt security
link
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0022103119308091
Mate Preferences and Their Behavioral Manifestations
link
https://www.annualreviews.org/doi/10.1146/annurev-psych-010418-103408
Relationships 2.0: When Did Marriage Become So Hard?
link
https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-when-did-marriage-become-so-hard/
Who Cheats More? The Demographics of Infidelity in America
link
https://ifstudies.org/blog/number-1-in-2018-who-cheats-more-the-demographics-of-infidelity-in-america/
The Science of Lasting Love with Dr. Sue Johnson
link
https://www.iheart.com/podcast/263-the-knowledge-project-with-45909500/episode/the-science-of-lasting-love-with-290039854/
Couples' shared participation in novel and arousing activities and experienced relationship quality
link
https://nyuscholars.nyu.edu/en/publications/couples-shared-participation-in-novel-and-arousing-activities-and
Dr. David Buss: How Humans Select & Keep Romantic Partners in Short & Long Term
link
https://www.hubermanlab.com/episode/dr-david-buss-how-humans-select-and-keep-romantic-partners-in-short-and-long-term
Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage, and Why We Stray
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/258144.Anatomy_of_Love
The Magic Relationship Ratio, According to Science
link
https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-magic-relationship-ratio-according-science/
Romantic love: a mammalian brain system for mate choice
link
https://royalsocietypublishing.org/doi/full/10.1098/rstb.2006.1938
Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/55723020-dopamine-nation
The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34068521-the-state-of-affairs
Marital processes predictive of later dissolution: behavior, physiology, and health
link
https://europepmc.org/article/MED/1403613
Oxytocin receptor is not required for social attachment in prairie voles
link
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0896627322010844
Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/274144.Mating_in_Captivity
Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9547885-attached
The secret to desire in a long-term relationship
link
https://www.ted.com/talks/esther_perel_the_secret_to_desire_in_a_long_term_relationship
#986 - Esther Perel — How Love Dies: The Psychology of Cheating & Attraction
link
https://www.iheart.com/podcast/256-modern-wisdom-30936734/episode/986-esther-perel-how-291022777/
Online Dating: A Critical Analysis From the Perspective of Psychological Science
link
https://www.psychologicalscience.org/publications/journals/pspi/online-dating.html
The Science of Love, Desire and Attachment
link
https://www.hubermanlab.com/episode/the-science-of-love-desire-and-attachment
Rethinking infidelity … a talk for anyone who has ever loved
link
https://www.ted.com/talks/esther_perel_rethinking_infidelity_a_talk_for_anyone_who_has_ever_loved
The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22516.The_Evolution_of_Desire
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/92533.The_Seven_Principles_for_Making_Marriage_Work
Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life
link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22609341-come-as-you-are
star
Input question

Why do relationships fall apart and how can we rebuild them?

Podcast Style
Niaplay
Jacksonplay

From Columbia University alumni built in San Francisco

BeFreed Brings Together A Global Community Of 200,000+ Curious Minds

"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."

@Moemenn
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."

@Chloe, Solo founder, LA
platform
comments12
likes117

"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."

@Raaaaaachelw
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."

@Matt, YC alum
platform
comments12
likes108

"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."

@Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
platform
comments254
likes17

"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."

@djmikemoore
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."

@Pitiful
platform
comments96
likes4.5K

"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."

@SofiaP
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"

@Jaded_Falcon
platform
comments201
thumbsUp16

"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."

@OojasSalunke
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."

@Leo, Law Student, UPenn
platform
comments37
likes483

"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"

@Cashflowbubu
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."

@Moemenn
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."

@Chloe, Solo founder, LA
platform
comments12
likes117

"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."

@Raaaaaachelw
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."

@Matt, YC alum
platform
comments12
likes108

"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."

@Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
platform
comments254
likes17

"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."

@djmikemoore
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."

@Pitiful
platform
comments96
likes4.5K

"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."

@SofiaP
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"

@Jaded_Falcon
platform
comments201
thumbsUp16

"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."

@OojasSalunke
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."

@Leo, Law Student, UPenn
platform
comments37
likes483

"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"

@Cashflowbubu
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."

@Moemenn
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."

@Chloe, Solo founder, LA
platform
comments12
likes117

"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."

@Raaaaaachelw
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."

@Matt, YC alum
platform
comments12
likes108

"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."

@Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
platform
comments254
likes17

"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."

@djmikemoore
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."

@Pitiful
platform
comments96
likes4.5K

"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."

@SofiaP
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"

@Jaded_Falcon
platform
comments201
thumbsUp16

"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."

@OojasSalunke
platform
starstarstarstarstar

"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."

@Leo, Law Student, UPenn
platform
comments37
likes483

"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"

@Cashflowbubu
platform
starstarstarstarstar
Start your learning journey, now