Getting More by Stuart Diamond Summary

Getting More offers a revolutionary approach to negotiation, emphasizing emotions, perceptions, and cultural empathy over traditional power-based tactics. Stuart Diamond, a Pulitzer Prize-winning negotiator and Wharton professor, teaches strategies applicable to everyday scenarios—from parenting to billion-dollar deals. The book challenges conventional ideas like “win-win” and BATNA, advocating for collaborative solutions that create four times more value.

Professionals, parents, entrepreneurs, and anyone seeking to improve communication and outcomes in negotiations. The strategies are used by Google, Microsoft, and U.S. Special Operations. Stuart Diamond’s methods help sales teams close deals, managers resolve conflicts, and parents motivate children, making it ideal for diverse audiences.

Yes. A New York Times and Wall Street Journal bestseller, Getting More is endorsed by Fortune 500 leaders and military commanders. Its practical, real-world examples—like resolving the 2008 Hollywood Writers’ Strike—demonstrate actionable frameworks. Readers call it “the best investment” for career growth.

1. Perceptions matter: Understand the other party’s emotional drivers.
2. Trade unequal items: Exchange low-cost concessions for high-value gains.
3. Incremental steps: Break negotiations into smaller, manageable agreements.
4. Cultural sensitivity: Adapt to diverse communication styles.

• Frame issues collaboratively: Use “we” language to align interests.
• Ask open-ended questions: Uncover hidden needs.
• Leverage standards: Cite precedents (e.g., market rates, policies) to justify requests.
• Build trust: Small commitments foster rapport for larger agreements.

Some readers note a lack of step-by-step guides for complex scenarios. Critics argue its focus on empathy may falter in high-stakes, adversarial negotiations. However, most praise its practicality over academic theories like Getting to Yes.

While Getting to Yes focuses on principled negotiation and BATNA, Getting More prioritizes emotional intelligence and incremental gains. Diamond’s model is praised for real-world applicability, whereas Fisher and Ury’s framework is more theoretical.

Microsoft’s Xbox team used its strategies to secure partnerships, while Google trained 12,000 employees globally. Key applications include client negotiations, conflict resolution, and cross-cultural deals. For example, framing proposals around a client’s budget constraints often yields better outcomes.

• “Negotiation is the art of letting the other side have your way.”
• “The person you’re negotiating with is your partner, not your adversary.”
• “Value is relative; find what’s cheap for you but valuable to them.”

Yes. Parents use Diamond’s “trading unequal items” tactic—e.g., swapping extra playtime for bedtime compliance. Couples apply collaborative framing to resolve conflicts, like dividing chores based on preferences.

Stuart Diamond is a Pulitzer-winning journalist, Wharton professor, and UN consultant. He has negotiated in 45 countries, advised Fortune 500 companies, and trained U.S. Special Forces. His course was Wharton’s most popular for 13 years.

The model stresses adapting to cultural norms, such as relationship-building in Asian markets or direct communication in Western contexts. Diamond highlights the 2008 Writers’ Strike resolution, where understanding union members’ emotional needs was key.

Traditional methods rely on power and logic, while Getting More prioritizes empathy and creativity. For example, instead of threatening a supplier with competition, Diamond suggests asking, “How can we grow together?”

Used by the U.S. military and corporations like Amazon, the framework has generated billions in deals. Translated into 27 languages, it remains a top negotiation guide 15 years post-publication.

Diamond’s course is taught at Penn Law and Engineering schools, with online workshops at gettingmore.com. The U.S. Special Operations Command includes it in required reading for leadership training.