第4章
Nourishing Awareness: Mindful Eating and Daily Activities
Eating practices in mindfulness transform ordinary meals into opportunities for deep awareness and connection with the universe. These practices help us recognize the precious gift of nourishment while cultivating compassion for those without food.
Eating is a profound meditative practice connecting us to the universe. Each meal reveals our interdependence with rain, sunshine, earth, and the labor of many people. Mindful eating begins with preparation-setting the table together in awareness. Before eating, practice breathing and genuinely smile at each person present. Look deeply at your food to see its connection to the earth; each bite contains "the life of the sun and the Earth."
To practice mindful eating, create a calm environment by turning off distractions. Begin with three mindful breaths to calm your body. Look at each person present with true awareness-this takes only seconds but creates genuine connection. Smile authentically as an offering of friendship. Contemplate your food, seeing in it the entire universe. Eat slowly and mindfully, tasting "the whole universe in a piece of bread." After finishing, take a moment to acknowledge your satisfaction and express gratitude.
The Five Contemplations provide a framework for mindful eating. They remind us that food comes from earth and sky, that we should be worthy of our food by eating mindfully, that we must eat in moderation, that we should choose food free of toxins, and that nourishment enables us to help others suffer less. When we eat with awareness of these principles, our food sustains not just our bodies but our compassion.
Even our kitchen can become a meditation space when approached mindfully. Through conscious cooking and cleaning, ordinary tasks transform into serene practice. Create a small kitchen altar with meaningful objects to transform your kitchen into a meditation hall. Begin cooking by offering incense and practicing mindful breathing. Allow ample time to cook without rushing, aware that this food nourishes practice. Clean with the same reverence as washing "the baby Buddha," finding joy and peace in this ordinary activity. Through this approach, "the profane is the Sacred" and "everyday mind is Buddha's mind."
Throughout our day, we can use gathas (short mindfulness verses) to help us remain present during daily activities. Like road signs guiding our journey, they bring awareness to simple acts we often take for granted, helping us return to ourselves throughout the day. When turning on water, we might recite "Water flows from high mountains. Water runs deep in the Earth. Miraculously water comes to us and sustains all life." While brushing teeth, we can vow to "Speak purely and lovingly." These verses unite mind and body, bringing peace and clarity to ordinary moments.
第5章
Healing Relationships: Deep Listening and Loving Speech
Much of our suffering stems from feeling disconnected from others-even those closest to us. Through mindfulness practice, we begin to see our interconnection with all beings. The Buddha taught that we need a community (Sangha) to flourish spiritually. A Sangha can be created anywhere-in families, workplaces, neighborhoods, even governments-when people practice deep listening and loving speech.
Being with a Sangha heals isolation through shared practices and daily activities that foster love and acceptance. Like a garden with diverse plants, each member contributes unique gifts while supporting others' growth. This reflects the Buddha's teaching of interbeing-that everything exists through everything else, empty of separate self yet full of the cosmos. When we see this interconnection, we suffer less and understand the importance of community.
When communication breaks down, suffering intensifies. Many people feel isolated even within their families because no one truly listens to them. Without deep listening and loving speech, we become like bombs ready to explode. Just ten minutes of compassionate listening can heal wounds and restore smiles. Many have lost these essential skills-becoming easily irritated, speaking harshly, and unable to restore harmony.
To practice deep listening, maintain compassion throughout the entire conversation through mindful breathing. Listen without judgment or advice, with the sole intention of relieving suffering. If irritation arises, breathe mindfully until it passes. Should you feel unable to continue listening compassionately, gently request to resume the conversation later after you've had time to practice and restore yourself.
The practice of Beginning Anew helps us look deeply at ourselves-our past actions, speech, and thoughts-to create fresh beginnings within ourselves and our relationships. We use this practice when difficulties arise or resentments build, helping us develop kind speech and compassionate listening by recognizing and appreciating positive elements in our community. Like watering flowers in a garden while starving the weeds, we nurture kindness while diminishing anger and misperception.
When hurt by someone we love, our immediate reaction often escalates conflict. Instead, we can breathe mindfully and request time to look deeply together. The Peace Treaty is a practice of making peace not just with others but within ourselves. We must recognize that punishing others leads nowhere-when we make loved ones suffer, they retaliate, creating an endless cycle.
Mindful hugging connects hearts and dissolves the illusion of separation. When practiced with full presence, hugging meditation brings reconciliation, healing, understanding, and happiness, helping to repair relationships between fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, friends, and others. To practice hugging meditation, begin by bowing to acknowledge the other person's presence. Close your eyes and visualize both of you three hundred years from now, bringing the insight of impermanence to life. Take three conscious breaths, smiling at the person before embracing them.
第6章
Embracing Difficult Emotions: Working with Anger and Fear
Our anger is like a crying baby needing its mother's embrace. Rather than rejecting anger, we should hold it tenderly and listen deeply to understand its causes. In Vietnamese tradition, children are taught to limit anger to five minutes, while Zen masters advise not keeping anger beyond one night. Strong emotions are like storms that can cause damage, so we must create a safe environment within ourselves while weathering them.
When anger arises, refrain from speaking or acting. Withdraw from the triggering situation and practice conscious breathing and walking meditation to calm yourself. Often, what angers us in others reflects our own unaccepted weaknesses. Try reciting verses while walking: "Breathing in, I know anger is in me. Breathing out, I know this feeling is unpleasant." Later: "Breathing in, I feel calm. Breathing out, I am strong enough to handle this anger."
Don't fight against strong emotions-this only creates self-violence. Instead, sit quietly with a straight back, return to your breath, and close the windows of your six senses. Focus on your breathing at the level of your lower belly, not letting your attention wander to your head. Stop all thinking and follow your breath like a captain holding tight to a ship's wheel during a storm. Remind yourself that all storms pass-everything is impermanent.
When facing difficulties, first nourish yourself with happiness before addressing challenges. Sit quietly in meditation using these two practices: First, acknowledge joy: "Breathing in, I am aware of joy in myself. Breathing out, I smile to the feeling of joy." Then address pain: "Breathing in, I am aware of the painful feeling in me. Breathing out, I release the tension within that painful feeling." By establishing a foundation of happiness first, you create the strength needed to work through your pain.
The practice of resting is essential, even when we're not sick. Just as forest animals rest completely when ill, directing all energy toward healing, we too must learn when to stop and rest. Mindfulness should energize, not tire us. When we're fatigued, we should find ways to rest-taking short walks, practicing silence, or simply stopping. Our bodies and minds have natural healing capacities that we often interfere with through worry and panic.
Deep relaxation allows our body to rest, heal, and restore itself from accumulated stress. It's particularly helpful for those with sleep difficulties, as it can either help induce sleep or provide nourishment and rest even when sleep doesn't come. The practice involves bringing mindful awareness to each part of the body in turn, sending love and care to every cell, particularly focusing on areas that need healing and attention.
第7章
Creating Mindful Families: Practicing with Children
Adults often believe their wisdom and experience make children's opinions unimportant. This mindset prevents truly understanding and loving young people. Without deep listening to children's difficulties and wishes, adults can unknowingly cause suffering.
Many adults mistakenly believe children know little due to their limited experience, dismissing their thoughts and feelings across generations. Without deeply understanding children's difficulties and wishes, adults cannot truly love them. Love must be based on understanding, or it becomes harmful. The most important thing is maintaining communication between parents and children-when this breaks down, both suffer.
Loving speech and deep listening open communication with children. Parents should use the language of love rather than authority, asking children if they feel understood and inviting them to share their difficulties. When your child speaks, practice listening deeply without interruption or criticism-even for hours if needed. Though small, children have deep insights and special needs that you may have overlooked, causing mutual suffering.
Walking with children offers a wonderful mindfulness practice. Taking a child's hand allows you to share your concentration and stability while receiving their freshness and innocence. Walking meditation also helps children calm down when experiencing strong emotions. At Plum Village, children learn to say "Oui, oui, oui" while breathing in and "Merci, merci, merci" while breathing out.
When a child experiences strong emotions, hold them in your arms or take their hand to practice breathing together. Share your capacity for solidity: "Hold my hand, we'll breathe together." Breathe deeply and slowly, helping the child feel strong on the in-breath and light on the out-breath. Older children can carry a pebble to use when upset, holding it while breathing and acknowledging their anger: "Breathing in, I know I am angry. Breathing out, I am taking good care of my anger." With practice, they'll eventually smile at their anger. Mindfulness works like sunlight-without effort, it transforms everything it touches, including anger.
Every home should have a designated Breathing Room or corner with a low table, flower, bell, and cushions. When feeling uneasy, sad, or angry, family members can go there to practice mindful breathing for ten or fifteen minutes. This prevents losing temper and creating storms in the family. Children can learn to invite their parents to breathe with them when tensions rise.
第8章
Finding Peace in Solitude: The Art of Being Alone
True solitude isn't about physical isolation but establishing oneself firmly in the present moment. As the Buddha taught in the Sutra on Knowing the Better Way of Living Alone, solitude means being aware of every feeling and perception without losing yourself in the past, future, or crowd. Without this capacity for being alone, we become impoverished internally and have little to offer others. Solitude comes from a stable heart that remains centered regardless of external circumstances-like a serene island within ourselves where we can take refuge through mindful breathing.
Begin by being physically alone, then learn to maintain solitude even when with others. True connection with the world comes from first relating to yourself. Practice sitting meditation, walking, meals, and working with others while always returning to your own island of mindfulness. Enjoy being with family and friends without getting lost in group emotions. Your community serves as support, reminding you to return to mindfulness. When you can smile and breathe peacefully even in the midst of society, you're dwelling in the island of self.
Genuine silence emerges from within rather than being imposed from outside. It's not merely the absence of talking or noise, but the absence of internal disturbance-when there's no talking inside our heads. The practice isn't about creating external silence separate from our activities, but cultivating inner silence within everything we do. When we achieve this internal quietude, awareness can penetrate deeply into our consciousness, allowing transformation to occur naturally.
Our overscheduled lives contribute significantly to stress and depression. We've pushed ourselves and our children to constant busyness, mistaking it for fulfillment. A Lazy Day offers freedom from scheduled activities, allowing the day to unfold naturally and timelessly. It provides space to reflect on our practice and relationships, recognizing whether we're forcing ourselves too much or need more balance. This practice confronts our fear of doing nothing-the very fear that drives our stress and depression. By learning to be without constantly doing, we create opportunities to cultivate peace, joy, and compassion.
A Lazy Day isn't about doing whatever you like, but intentionally refraining from doing anything-resisting the habit energy of constant activity. Try to do nothing, which is surprisingly difficult. Learn that time isn't just for doing but for being: being alive, peaceful, joyful, and loving. The quality of your being determines the quality of your doing, and all action must be grounded in non-action.
第9章
The Path of Transformation: From Individual to Collective Healing
Love begins with accepting ourselves as we are. Through deep looking, we understand the conditions that have shaped us, making self-acceptance easier. As Queen Mallika told King Prasenajit, no one loves us more than we love ourselves. The Buddha affirmed this, saying once we understand self-love's importance, we stop making others suffer. Metta (loving kindness) practice moves beyond aspiration to deep understanding through examining our body, feelings, perceptions, mental formations, and consciousness. With practice, love enters our thoughts, words, and actions, bringing peace and freedom from anxiety.
Many of us carry a wounded child within, making it difficult to trust, love, and receive love. Though the pain may seem overwhelming, we must learn to return to this wounded child with mindfulness. Begin with mindful walking, sitting, and breathing, possibly with supportive friends nearby. Speak directly to your wounded child: "Darling, I am here for you. I will take good care of you." Talk to your child several times daily to initiate healing. Your wounded child may represent generational trauma; by healing yourself, you can break this cycle and even liberate those who hurt you.
When we've caused others suffering, wounds remain in both their consciousness and ours-even if the event happened long ago or the person has died. Unilateral disarmament means we disarm ourselves regardless of the other person's response or presence. We don't need them physically present to heal ourselves and achieve reconciliation. When we become peaceful and choose not to attack or argue, we create peace within that affects others.
The Fourteen Mindfulness Trainings are a modern version of the bodhisattva precepts, embodying mindfulness in everyday life rather than abstract teachings. They help us recognize our interconnectedness-that we can only "inter-be" with everyone and everything. These trainings contain each other and build upon The Five Mindfulness Trainings, which offer concrete ways to practice compassion and understanding in daily life. Universal and nonsectarian, they provide guidance for responding to unhealthy choices in society.
All these mindfulness practices share the same purpose: reuniting mind with body, cultivating true presence, and becoming fully alive in the light of mindfulness. Though simple-breathing, mindful steps, deep listening, appreciating beauty-these practices help us touch our true nature beyond birth and death.
If we desire peace within ourselves and our world, practice is essential. Without it, we lack the mindfulness energy needed to handle our own fear and anger, as well as others'. Mindfulness isn't just beneficial-it's necessary for our survival, peace, and protection. The world is like the Dharmakaya, filled with precious jewels that we fail to recognize. Though we possess a treasure of enlightenment and love within, we behave as if destitute. These practices help us reclaim our rich inheritance of understanding and joy.
