
In "The Road to Character," David Brooks challenges our resume-obsessed culture, advocating instead for "eulogy virtues." Bill Gates named it a favorite for its profound wisdom on moral development - a timely reminder that what's remembered at your funeral matters more than your LinkedIn profile.
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We live in a world that celebrates external success above all else. In "The Road to Character," David Brooks identifies a profound cultural shift from what he calls the "Little Me" culture of humility to today's "Big Me" era of self-promotion. This transformation is striking: in 1950, only 12% of high school seniors considered themselves "very important persons" - by 2005, that number had skyrocketed to 80%. Our society constantly reinforces messages of self-importance: "You are special. Trust yourself. Be true to yourself." Even institutions like the Girl Scouts have shifted from teaching self-sacrifice to self-focus. But what if this obsession with external achievement is preventing us from building what truly matters - character? What if the qualities that make a meaningful life aren't the ones that look good on a resume, but rather those mentioned in our eulogies? Most of us live with an internal tension between two competing selves. There's Adam I - our ambitious, career-focused self who seeks external success and status. Then there's Adam II - our deeper self who longs for moral virtue and inner character. Our culture overwhelmingly celebrates and rewards Adam I achievements, while Adam II development gets neglected. The most impressive people somehow integrate these competing selves. They radiate what Brooks calls "moral joy" - a remarkable inner cohesion. These rare individuals answer harsh words with soft responses. They maintain dignity when humiliated. They perform acts of service without self-promotion. What's striking is how different they are from our cultural ideal. They don't maximize self-expression or pursue happiness directly. Instead, they've built character by confronting their weaknesses and developing self-effacing virtues: humility, restraint, and self-discipline.