The Curious History of Dating by Nichi Hodgson Summary

The Curious History of Dating explores the evolution of romantic relationships from the 1700s to modern dating apps, examining how laws, technology, and societal norms shaped courtship. Nichi Hodgson traces shifts in gender dynamics, class barriers, and LGBTQ+ experiences, blending historical analysis with feminist insights. The book highlights pivotal moments like Victorian-era matchmaking, wartime romances, and the rise of Tinder.

This book suits history enthusiasts, sociology students, and anyone curious about dating’s cultural roots. Feminists, LGBTQ+ advocates, and readers interested in relationships will appreciate its analysis of power structures and societal change. Hodgson’s witty tone makes it accessible for casual readers and academics alike.

Yes—Hodgson combines rigorous research with engaging storytelling, revealing surprising anecdotes (like Georgian-era “sex guides” and WWII-era “kissing competitions”). It challenges assumptions about historical prudishness and offers context for modern dating struggles. Critics note some sections could delve deeper, but its breadth remains a strength.

WWI introduced British women to American soldiers, fostering cross-cultural relationships and shifting perceptions of premarital intimacy. WWII’s upheaval normalized casual dating and accelerated women’s independence, as rationing and wartime jobs reshaped social interactions. These conflicts laid groundwork for postwar sexual liberation movements.

From 17th-century newspaper personal ads (enabled by the 1662 Licensing Act’s repeal) to 1960s telephone dating lines, technology expanded romantic possibilities. Hodgson argues apps like Tinder democratized access but intensified commodification of relationships, mirroring patterns seen in earlier innovations like photography and automobiles.

Hodgson documents covert LGBTQ+ networks, like Victorian “molly houses” and 20th-century classified ads in coded language. She highlights how legal persecution forced creativity in communication, contrasting it with today’s app-driven visibility. The analysis underscores ongoing struggles for acceptance across eras.

The book critiques systemic sexism, such as 18th-century “breach of promise” lawsuits that penalized women for broken engagements. It also examines class-based exclusion in matchmaking and racial biases in interwar “eugenic dating” trends. Hodgson ties these to modern issues like algorithmic bias in apps.

Examples include 1848 matchmaking ledgers separating client photos from personality details, 1920s etiquette manuals warning against “motorcar dates,” and 1980s video dating tapes. These artifacts reveal how each era’s media shaped romantic ideals—a theme Hodgson extends to digital profiles.

Austen’s novels reflect 19th-century courtship’s focus on wealth and social standing, mirroring The Times’ early personal ads. Hodgson contrasts this with Austen’s subversive heroines, arguing they laid groundwork for feminist critiques of marriage-as-transaction still relevant today.

Ghosting and “situationships” mirror 18th-century “leading someone on” via unanswered love letters, while apps echo Victorian matchmaking agencies’ commodification. Hodgson warns that convenience often sacrifices depth, urging readers to learn from history’s emphasis on intentional connection.

Indirectly—by showing how past generations navigated constraints, she advocates questioning norms (e.g., prioritizing emotional intimacy over algorithm-driven matches). The book encourages leveraging modern freedoms while avoiding historical pitfalls like status-obsessed courtship.

Unlike purely anthropological studies, Hodgson’s feminist lens and focus on British culture provide niche depth. It complements Moira Weigel’s Labor of Love (US-focused economics) or Stephanie Coontz’s Marriage, a History (global institutional analysis) by emphasizing individual agency and subcultures.