Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is): A Study Guide for Women by Shannon Harris & Joshua Harris Summary

1. Lust warps God’s gift of sexuality into idolatrous craving for the forbidden
2. Women’s lust often manifests through emotional fantasy rather than visual temptation
3. Accountability partnerships dismantle isolation that fuels secret sexual struggles
4. Scripture memorization weaponizes truth against lust’s deceptive narratives
5. Identify personal lust-triggers to create custom-tailored purity strategies
6. Purity requires rejecting both physical acts and heart-level compromises
7. God designed sexual desire for marital intimacy, not self-focused gratification
8. Shannon Harris redefines purity as ongoing reliance on God’s strength
9. Cultural “romance” narratives often normalize lust in women’s media
10. Seven practical steps combat internet porn’s accessibility and anonymity
11. Holiness grows through daily choices, not dramatic one-time victories
12. Church community provides essential grace for lifelong purity journeys

About the Author of Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is)

Shannon Harris, author of Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is) – A Study Guide for Women, is a Christian author, musician, and advocate for redefining spiritual identity beyond patriarchal norms. Her work explores themes of faith, marriage, and self-discovery within evangelical communities, drawing from her personal experience as the former wife of Joshua Harris, bestselling author of I Kissed Dating Goodbye.

Her memoir, The Woman They Wanted: Shattering the Illusion of the Good Christian Wife (2023), details her journey through the purity culture movement and her path to reclaiming autonomy, earning acclaim for its candid critique of restrictive gender roles.

Joshua Harris, a former pastor and influential figure in 1990s evangelicalism, gained prominence for I Kissed Dating Goodbye, which sold over 1 million copies and shaped Christian courtship ideologies before he publicly disavowed it in 2018. Together, their works reflect evolving dialogues on faith, relationships, and personal agency in modern Christianity.

Shannon’s insights have been featured in outlets like Sojourners, while Joshua’s legacy remains a touchstone in critiques of purity culture. I Kissed Dating Goodbye has been translated into 15+ languages.

FAQs About Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is)

What is Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is) - A Study Guide for Women about?

Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is) - A Study Guide for Women is a Christian-focused resource co-authored by Shannon and Joshua Harris, designed to help women address lust through biblical principles. It provides discussion questions, accountability tools, and reflections to foster holiness, framing lust as a universal struggle rather than a male-specific issue. The guide emphasizes prayer, community support, and scriptural alignment.

Who should read Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is) - A Study Guide for Women?

This study guide targets Christian women seeking to navigate purity culture or manage temptations related to lust. It’s ideal for individual reflection, small groups, or church classes, particularly those familiar with Joshua Harris’s I Kissed Dating Goodbye or invested in evangelical teachings on sexuality.

Is Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is) worth reading?

For readers aligned with conservative evangelical teachings, the guide offers structured spiritual tools. However, those critiquing purity culture may find its approach outdated, given broader societal shifts. Its value depends on theological perspective and interest in Shannon Harris’s earlier work before her public reassessment of these ideals.

What are the main concepts in Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is)?

Key ideas include:

• Lust as a spiritual issue requiring repentance and accountability.
• Gender-specific strategies for resisting temptation.
• The role of community and scripture in achieving purity.
• Emphasis on Jesus’s transformative power over sin.

How does the study guide address women’s struggles with lust?

It combines biblical analysis with practical exercises, urging women to identify triggers, pursue accountability partnerships, and reframe desires through prayer. The material avoids stigmatizing sexuality while advocating for self-control aligned with evangelical values.

What is Shannon Harris’s role in co-authoring this guide?

Shannon Harris contributed as a co-author during her time as a pastor’s wife and conservative Christian figure. Her later memoir, The Woman They Wanted, critiques the gender roles and theological constraints she experienced, contrasting with this guide’s stance.

How does this book relate to Joshua Harris’s I Kissed Dating Goodbye?

Both works emerged from the 1990s-2000s purity culture movement. While I Kissed Dating Goodbye focused on relational boundaries, this study guide tackles lust directly, extending the Harrises’ teachings to women’s experiences.

What are criticisms of Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is)?

Critics argue it perpetuates shame-based theology and oversimplifies complex human sexuality. Its approach has been reevaluated amid broader rejections of purity culture, notably by Shannon Harris herself in her post-divorce memoir.

Does the guide include discussion questions or group activities?

Yes, it features structured questions for individual or group use, prompting self-reflection on topics like media consumption, emotional triggers, and biblical interpretations of lust. Activities aim to foster open dialogue and accountability.

How does Shannon Harris’s memoir The Woman They Wanted contrast with this study guide?

In her 2023 memoir, Harris critiques the patriarchal systems underlying purity culture, contrasting sharply with this guide’s uncritical endorsement of those ideals. Her later work highlights personal growth and rejecting prescribed roles, offering a post-evangelical perspective.

Is Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is) relevant to modern Christian audiences?

While some churches still use it, many congregations have shifted toward more nuanced teachings on sexuality. Its relevance depends on doctrinal alignment, though readers often pair it with contemporary critiques for balanced discussion.

What key quotes define the guide’s message?

• “Lust Is Not Just a Guy Problem” underscores its core thesis.
• “Jesus can free anyone from [lust’s] power” reflects its theological focus on redemption.
• “Celebrate purity” encapsulates the aspirational tone.