Raising Men by Eric Davis & Dina Santorelli Summary

Raising Men provides a Navy SEAL-inspired parenting framework to raise resilient, disciplined sons through strategies like fostering mental toughness, constructive conflict resolution, and intentional skill-building. Eric Davis emphasizes adventurous bonding experiences, leadership modeling, and cultivating a growth mindset to prepare boys for adulthood.

This book targets fathers, stepfathers, and mentors seeking actionable methods to instill resilience, responsibility, and leadership in boys aged 5–18. It’s particularly valuable for parents interested in military-derived discipline techniques or outdoor-based bonding activities.

Yes—readers praise its blend of military rigor and practical parenting tactics, such as the “PAID” (Plan, Analyze, Implement, Debrief) framework for teaching problem-solving. Critics note its focus on traditional masculinity may require adaptation for modern or non-adventurous families.

Davis advocates:

• Leading by example (modeling accountability and emotional control)
• Adventure-based bonding (camping, survival challenges)
• Constructive debriefing after failures to reinforce learning
• Gradual independence through incremental responsibilities

The book emphasizes clear, direct dialogue paired with active listening. Davis recommends weekly “field reports” (structured check-ins) and using mission-planning metaphors to discuss goals, setbacks, and emotions.

Developed from SEAL training, PAID stands for Plan, Analyze, Implement, Debrief—a cyclical method for teaching sons to approach challenges strategically. For example, planning a bike repair project, analyzing mistakes post-completion, and applying lessons to future tasks.

Davis advises immediate, consistent consequences paired with coaching. Instead of punitive measures, he promotes “corrective training”—guided repetition of tasks until mastery—to turn mistakes into learning opportunities.

The book recommends wilderness camping, navigation challenges, survival skill drills, and team-based physical competitions. These activities build trust, problem-solving skills, and shared accomplishment.

Davis stresses transitioning from directive leadership to advisory support by late adolescence. Tactics include assigning household management roles, encouraging part-time jobs, and facilitating mentorship relationships outside the family.

Some reviewers argue the military-inspired approach may overlook emotional vulnerability development. Others suggest the intense focus on resilience could downplay mental health considerations in sensitive children.

His SEAL experience informs strategies like stress inoculation training, team-based accountability systems, and mission-focused goal-setting. The book adapts combat-tested resilience techniques for parenting contexts.

It combines special operations philosophy with hands-on activity guides, offering tools like debrief templates, adventure checklists, and progress-tracking systems rarely seen in traditional parenting literature.