Bringing Up Girls by James C. Dobson Summary

Bringing Up Girls offers faith-based parenting advice focused on raising daughters with strong moral values amid modern cultural pressures. It emphasizes protecting girls’ innocence, fostering father-daughter relationships, and countering societal influences like premature sexualization. A central parable involves a girl preserving a charm bracelet representing her virtue until marriage.

This book targets Christian parents seeking guidance on instilling traditional values in daughters. It’s particularly relevant for those concerned about media influences on self-image or seeking strategies to navigate adolescence within a conservative framework.

A 16-year-old girl receives a charm bracelet where each jewel symbolizes a romantic milestone (holding hands, kissing). Parents instruct her to give charms to boys who initiate these actions. The story aims to discourage early physical intimacy, culminating in her giving the intact bracelet to her fiancé.

Dobson critiques media and peer pressure for promoting premature sexualization (“sexpots”) and unrealistic beauty standards. He advises parents to actively counteract these influences through open communication, boundary-setting, and emphasizing inner character over external validation.

Fathers are portrayed as critical to daughters’ self-worth, with their affirmation directly shaping girls’ confidence and future relationships. Dobson warns against emotionally absent fathers, linking their involvement to reduced susceptibility to unhealthy romantic attachments.

Critics argue the book prioritizes virginity over holistic development and perpetuates gender stereotypes (e.g., girls as “sugar and spice”). Some find its tone paternalistic, overly focused on sexual purity, and dismissive of girls’ autonomy during adolescence.

Both books stress traditional gender roles and parental vigilance, but Bringing Up Girls uniquely addresses beauty culture, peer pressure, and father-daughter dynamics. While Boys focuses on discipline and leadership, Girls emphasizes emotional protection.

• Boundary-setting: Clear rules for dating and media consumption.
• Affirmation: Frequent verbal reassurance to build self-esteem.
• Cultural vigilance: Monitoring friendships and social trends.
• Faith integration: Using biblical principles to guide decisions.

Dobson frames adolescence as a vulnerable period requiring heightened parental oversight. He advocates delaying romantic relationships, fostering mother-daughter trust for open dialogue, and preparing girls to reject societal pressures around body image and sexuality.

• “A father’s love can fortify a daughter against a world that would teach her to hate herself.”
  Highlights paternal influence on self-perception.
• “Girls are made to be loved, not to be ‘sexpots.’”
  Reflects Dobson’s critique of sexualized media portrayals.

While its cultural references may feel dated, the book resonates with parents opposing hypersexualized media and seeking faith-aligned frameworks. Critics argue it underestimates girls’ resilience and modern gender dynamics.

Dobson’s The Strong-Willed Child (behavioral guidance) and Love Must Be Tough (relationship boundaries) expand on core themes. Secular alternatives like Untangled by Lisa Damour offer developmental insights without religious framing.